Monday, June 23, 2008

Tragedies

Tragedies: Just when we thought we're resurrecting from the biggest blow in our family life, my dad lost his job, my 7 months old niece needs immeidate medical attention for possiblities to go blind, my 2 other siblings needs to be enrolled to college (nursing), my brother's wife left him for another leaving me 3 kids to care for and the only person who stood for everybody (also referred to as "Mommy of perpetual help" is sick!
For a while I felt the world stood still. It's like it's impossible to 'snap out of it' that I feel as though I cannot do ANYTHING...How wanted to end it all 'cause I hate what I'm into and it is tourtue to live and pretend that life is alright.But somehow something happened. After a liter of tears and sored knees from the hard pew of San Pedro Cathedral, I realized that I should stop acting like the lead of my favorite telenovela and just try to see the better side of life.
Maybe because I've become better off because of these things that are unexpectedly happening to us. I don t brag about the sufferings me and my family had endured especially my mom and dad, and I have no plans on counting all the tragedies we have endured all these lifetime, simply because Tragedies are not something one can chose to occur, nor are they something one can make occur.
This is not rebellion, but I feel that in order to become better, I must be brought low, I must suffer, so I bring myself into this depressing situation because sometimes I feel I deserve it. I've gone through tragedy enough to relate and to be accepted with them.I'm sure to some may think I sound like a twisted thinker, but life no matter how bad it is should be viewed positively as possible. Everything happens for a reason and maybe it's God's way of shaking us a bit and realize that it is not how much we have but how much we enjoy about the little things that we have that brings happiness.
People may step on our pride...think ill of us despite the good things we did for them, but for as long as we know the truth and we do the most honest and the best thing we can give, we have bigger chances to overcome all these.
My suggestion for living when you feel like this is to to throw all caution to the wind. Eat an entire gallon of ice cream. Why not? who cares? Eventually, you'll find that while you may not stop hating life, you'll be able to tolerate it. and you'll discover that occasionally, you'll actually find joy in a few little things. Don't rush trying to find joy in things. It may come eventually. Just work on trying to tolerate life for now. And keep doing things. If anything, they make the days pass by faster.

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